This time, spells which I learned from Hogwarts, albeit unforgivable, might come in handy. Let me browse my book, "A Guide to Being a Marvelous Wizard by Albus Dumbledore," which I just purchased from Diagon Alley yesterday with my three best friends-- Harry, Hermione, and Ron. (ha-ha).
"Hmmmm.... AHA! There!"
This is exactly what I was looking for.
---------------------------------------------------------
These PUJ drivers better prepare to be Imperio-ed:
#1- Jeepney Drivers who WANT YOU DEAD
-They drop you off in the middle of the road with fleeting trucks and cars ready to smite you at any moment. Aside from possible injuries you might face head on, it could be your last day on this planet. Prepare to enjoy the glory of eternal life and finally break free from the shackles of suffering.
#2- Jeepney Drivers who JERK A LOT
-(I said jerk, not jerk off) Of course, we all hate that feeling of getting suddenly pushed back and forth especially when we're still about to get on or alight the jeepney.
These jeepney drivers either want you to lose a tooth, get a concussion, break a bone, or die a little because of embarrassment as you stumble and fumble your way into your seat/out of the jeepney.
#3- Jeepney Drivers who GIVE AN UNSOLICITED ROLLER COASTER RIDE
-Riding a roller coaster spells fun but when a jeepney acts like a roller coaster... you gotta be doomed. Close your mouth 'cause you might puke your inards out.
#4- Jeepney Drivers who THINK YOU'RE STUPID
-They intentionally don't give your change right away expecting you to actually forget about it which is never gonna happen since it's imprinted in your head the moment you paid for your fare.
#5- Jeepney Drivers who GLOWER, SCOWL, FROWN LIKE A BOSS
-I don't know if they've eaten something totally gross that turned them into some really nasty beasts or they're just innately hostile. But, seriously, they need to gulp a lot of sunshine with sugar, spice, and everything nice.
